Big life transitions can be challenging for anyone, but when it comes to little ones, they can be much harder and more emotional. Structure and routine feel safe for children, so new experiences like moving, attending a new school, welcoming a sibling, or having a new babysitter can be extremely scary. Adults typically know how to face changes thanks to building skills of resilience, but children need extra support when it comes to addressing their feelings, understanding and adjusting to big changes, and learning new strategies in skills along the way, to help with the transition period. If your family is going through a big change or transition, here are some of the best ways to get your kids involved in a big life transition:
Get them excited
First of all, one helpful thing to consider is how you are feeling about everything. Once you are composed and can help guide your children through the big upcoming change, you should try to get them excited. Show them the future potential: how great this transition will make life for them!
Give them as much information as you can
One way to help is by giving them as much information as you can. There are so many ways to do this, and this also gives them time to process and accept the change. Start with the basics. Let’s use moving as an example throughout the rest of this post, just to keep it consistent. If you are moving, tell them all the deets. Start with what will change, what will stay the same, and what they can expect. Give them every single detail possible because this will help with accepting the chance. To support the emotional process, you can get them plenty of books. So many children’s books are written to help kids cope with major life changes, so this is very useful. If they are struggling, talk about other changes that have happened in the past. When they realize that they’ve gone through other changes (and they see a positive outcome), it might get them more excited!
Set realistic expectations
When you are going through a big life change, such as a move, keep your expectations realistic, whenever possible. You cannot just expect for them to be 100% fine during the entire process. They will have big emotions and there definitely might be ups and downs, maybe nights of little to no sleep, and maybe even a lot of tears or angry moments too. Don’t expect everything to be butterflies and rainbows. They will work through this, but it might just take some time! During this process, try giving them as much consistency and stability as possible. Bedtimes and meal times should remain as consistent as possible to restore a sense of safety during whatever new change you are going through.
Take the time to listen
If there are questions and concerns, take the time to listen. Sometimes, just lending an ear helps so much – with any fears or worries. Sometimes, depending on the circumstance, you might want to look into extra professional counseling, but most of the time during a simple transition (like a move), you listening to them and working it out alongside them helps significantly!
Give them a checklist and make it fun
Last but not least, give them a checklist and make it fun. Getting them involved is such a great way to help them through the transition. If you are moving, have them help the movers (if possible) and choose their own room. I heard of a moving company that “hired” the kids of a family one day. The kids helped the movers, and the movers paid them (a very small amount) at the end of the day. It was such a fun way for the kids to help! THIS is a great example of a company that goes above and beyond, which is what you want to find. In Utah, I recently heard of Movin’. They are commercial movers Salt Lake City and they have phenomenal reviews, which talk about how they go above and beyond for their clients. A great moving company can MAKE your big move go much more smoothly, which will also make the overall transition period a lot less stressful for the entire family.
