Our Unexpected Birth Story

I want to start this off by saying, our birth story was a bit traumatic for me. I want to share the good and the bad, because I know not every birth is picture perfect.

Summer’s due date was October 19th, but we decided with our midwife that getting induced 5 days prior would be in our best interest. We live an hour from the hospital and this allowed us to have a game plan for our toddler to be watched by our parents. Because we have such a commute, we decided to stay at a hotel near the hospital just in case. Monday the 7th, we had our 38 week appointment and I had them check for dilation because I wanted to see where we stood before I was to be induced the next week. I was at 3.5 and that made me feel so optimistic!

We had our toddler in daycare and afterwards just spent the day to ourselves catching a movie and I got my nails done, and enjoying this last week before baby arrived. I had experienced contractions on and off during the day and at one point in the hotel room I told my husband I feel like this baby might come today.

That same night I was having severe contractions. We had laid our toddler down at 9, and I kept getting up to pee, bounce on my ball, or lean over the bed while going through the pain. It was about 11pm when I started tracking them and they were fairly consistent, but I just kept telling myself they didn’t feel strong enough and I don’t want to waste our time. I decided to try and get some rest, but at 1am I was woken up with painful contractions that were 5-6 minutes apart. I woke my husband up and told him I think we need to go in. I felt terrible because he had work the next day and that meant getting Sav out of bed too. We quickly gathered the hospital bag, a few things like my camera and food for Sav, and her pack n play and rushed out the door.

When we got to the hospital they were 1-2 minutes apart. I was very calm and I think the whole time the staff thought I wasn’t in labor until they saw the contractions chart!A doctor came in and I was dilated to a 5 and got admitted at 3 am. We quickly called both of our parents, and my mom booked a new flight (since she already had one for the next week for induction she had to act fast!) and his parents started packing and hitting the road a few hours later. After a few hours of terrible contractions, I didn’t progress at all.

Since I was early they wouldn’t induce me and even suggested I go hone and wait it out. I had a feeling I needed to stay and shouldn’t leave so they instead put me on morphine so I could get some rest and see if I’ve made progress. Poor Sav was able to get sleep through the morning and woke up when my mom arrived!

Hours later, I had only dilated to a 6-7 before things went downhill fast. Because I did dilate some, I went ahead and asked for the epidural because I didn’t want to miss the time in case I progressed quickly after the doctor broke my water. My nurses were ecstatic because they were having to advocate for me to stay too, and we finally had a reason too since I had dilated even just a little.

They kept struggling to get her heart rate, and doctor was concerned because many times she wasn’t able to reach up and feel her head. She kept saying she could feel a bulging sac but it was hard to get an update. They decided to attach an ultrasound to baby’s head and insert another probe to monitor for a better read and were unsuccessful.

I ended up pouring out blood clots and next thing I know there were 10+ nurses and doctors swarming. They all were talking so fast and running and ultrasound and I experienced the most pain I had ever felt, as they were reaching inside of me trying to figure everything out. I had a placenta abruption (at the time I had no clue what this meant) and a main doctor started running through all of the next options. Nothing really processed except for words like “emergency c section, possible hysterectomy, we will need you to sign this, blood transfusion”. My head was just swarming and I broke down sobbing. My husband and mom never left my side, and I had my sweet nurse at my head coaching me saying “at this point baby is healthy and that is what’s most important. You got this”. Without that support I can’t imagine how I would have gotten through this next hour.

Within minutes I’m being wheeled into the surgery room. I am in so much terror at not knowing anything about c sections and just sat there staring at the ceiling and couldn’t talk. Thankfully I already had an epidural in and they pumped me up where I was just drifting and so out of it! I felt so limp and I could barely keep my eyes open or thoughts straight.

My husband arrived at my head minutes later and just talked to me and they had her out in minutes. Summer was born at 5:58 Pm.

I felt one big pressure and the rest of the time felt like I was being swayed by waves and all I could think about is seeing our baby girl and if she was okay. I remember my husband saying, “do you hear that? She is crying!” And I just started panicking because I couldn’t hear anything and kept saying “is she? I can’t hear her, can you see her?” Those moments I felt so terrified and after a bit James got up and got to meet our baby girl for the first time. He brought back her little hat she was wearing and in the distance I hear them saying she needs to go to the nicu. On her way out I was able to see her precious face for the first time and give her a kiss. Then they were both gone. I had a doctor take my husband’s place and hold my hand and he kept talking to me even though I felt like I was all alone now.

A c section is the weirdest feeling in the world and it felt like the longest yet quickest few moments of my life.

I was in the operating room and couldn’t feel any part of my body, even as they tried to move me to a new bed I couldn’t even lift my arms and put them on my chest. They moved me to another room where I was given a liter of blood via transfusion because I had lost so much. My mother in law came in after just arriving, as well as my mom and they sat with me while I came through and tried to piece together what just happened. My husband, Sav, and father in law were all with her in the nicu and then they traded off so our moms could meet her too. This is when they all got to hear her full name, since we kept her middle name a secret and I wish I was there to be in that moment.

Summer Lauralei has a special meaning to us. My mother in law goes by Summer, and Laura is after my sister who passed away when I was 16. The name couldn’t be more perfect and I love that we have a piece of both sides of our families there.

A few hours passed and I was finally wheeled to meet baby girl and hold her. The NICU was such a foreign thing to me, and I wouldn’t wish it on any parent or baby. She had to stay in there to monitor if she would need a blood transfusion too, but also because she needed to be on oxygen. Seeing a tiny baby in a glass bed hooked up to many machines is a heartbreaking scene, I just wanted to hold her forever and let her know we were there.

Going to my hospital room empty handed is a gut wrenching feeling. I had to stay in for 3 nights and would just sob because neither of our girls were there with us. I know I just had major surgery, but I felt so useless and like I didn’t need to be there without my babies.

We would go visit her every few hours, and I don’t know how I would’ve made it through without my sweet husband. He had to help me into a wheelchair, and take me down a floor each time. He would even take trips by himself to see her and bring the colostrum I was pumping. I was constantly being woken up to check on my vitals, incision, given medication, and had the nicu calling me when she was awake so I could breastfeed. I don’t even want to guess how much sleep we got between the two of us, but I would do it all over again.

This experience still feels so raw, as none of this was a part of the plan. However, I am just so thankful we are both alive and we made it through. I’m so thankful for our family of four, and thank you to all who have reached out with love and prayers.