In scary, stressful situations humans are faced with a flight or fight decision. While flight definitely sounds more appealing, fight is often what we are left with when it comes to deployments. As significant others staying on the home front, we have to face the music and handle the deployment. Speaking of music, what’s a song you would use to describe Deployments? Hello, Darkness my old friend comes to my mind…

While your significant other is gearing up in preparation for the deployment, tracking down a list of 50+ military gear that will soon cover your floor, and enjoying their last taste of comfy beds and home cooked meals…

How are you preparing for the deployment?

Will you stay or will you go?

Probably the biggest proposition (primarily in young military families) we are faced with. Will you stay at your duty station, or will you go home? This decision can’t be decided by others, it’s what is best for you and your family. Are your kids in school and have friends? Are you just renting and can use some quality family time? Do you have a job you don’t want to lose? Ask yourself major questions like these to decide if you will be staying put or packing up to return to your hometown. Starting with this, will help prepping for the deployment a lot more tangible because you know where you will be. The first month of deployment is when a lot of decisions will be made, so make sure you choose the best for you.

Figure out what you will be doing during those months. Your Significant Other has a mission, what’s yours? Will you be going to school, working full time, start working out, living your best life, travelling?

Have a plan. You don’t want to spend this deployment period surviving, you should aim to thrive. Have a personal mission that you plan to complete, and this will not only make the time go by faster; but it will also leave you feeling accomplished and achieving in your own right. I have a post all about self care while your husband is gone.

It’s an on going saying, that when they leave for deployments, everything breaks. Seriously, it is like a deployment curse as if things are bad enough already! Be proactive and have a list of resources and numbers of contacts you will need. Get the FRG number, have contacts for plumbers, electricians, lawn companies, you name it. This isn’t to jinx anything, but if something breaks you’ll want to have the number ready and not scrambling. Trust me, when things hit the fan it’ll also happen to be the time your SO doesn’t have signal because that is just how things go. Have a list of everything written out and keep it in a place you’ll remember.

Some of the time, when deployments occur you are now in charge of the finances (if you weren’t already). Set a budget and plan accordingly. You’ll have a smaller grocery bill, and save some on monthly expenses so set your budget while they are gone.

Factoring in all the income and expenses will keep you on top of things and *hopefully* able to save during deployments.

Have a run through of all the bills you have, and stay organized.

Going along with this, factor in the deployment pay. Will you be putting any extra money towards bills, debt, savings? Having that extra cash can be so tempting to blow it all, but use this time to your advantage and set your family ahead. On the flip side, what if you are making less during deployment? How do you plan to budget for that? Figure all of these circumstances out early on so you can have a smooth sailing deployment for you and your servicemember. Have both of you figure out a budget, because overseas they do have access to the money too. It is common to get caught up in spending when you don’t have your partner with you to be the voice of reason.

With your loved one being gone, you need to think realistically and protect your family. Whether that’s installing security alarms or cameras, having self defense items, whatever precautions you believe you should take now is the time to do so. Also, this goes for Operation Security and protecting your servicemember. Don’t share dates, locations, whereabouts, anything. You never know who is reading, so be cautious with sharing posts and pictures publically. This may be a great time to remind family of the same, your job on the homefront is to keep them same just as their job is to keep us safe.

Having something to look forward to will help big time. Plan a visit with family or friends, attend weekly play dates, something that you love and will bring excitement to your days. Short term or long term, either way having that event to look forward to is essential. Deployments can seem looming for some, so by having this in mind, it will hopefully lighten it up for you. Another thing to think about is planning skype calls (as much as you can right? ha!), monthly care packages, birthdays, and anniversaries. Especially bigger events like birthdays, these are great things to plan by putting all your energy into something positive! Plan what you will wear for homecoming (click here for budget friendly!), it can be small things like this to look forward to that keep you sane.

Care packages are super fun because not only are you sending sweet things to your loved one, but it can also serve as a countdown in a way. Another care package is another month down! I have a few posts about this, if you want to make a patriotic themed one, if you want to have a care package for the summer months, and more! They don’t have to be extravagant, even something simple will show you are thinking about them. Another alternative is to send letters if you just want to show your love and support for your servicemember. Either way they will love it!




Having documents stored and available is also an essential. Keep passports, social security cards, insurance cards, ID’s, and any other documents in a secured, accessible place. If you and your SO decided to get a Power of Attorney, make sure you keep up with that document. (This is great to have, just in case. You can read more about what it is here).

Deployments happen, so make the most of it and be prepared. Seek solace in friends and other spouses who have gone through deployments, you will find great support and empathy with them. If you are going through a deployment now or in the future, I send virtual hugs to you! What are some things you plan to do during deployment season? I would love to hear below! Maybe your ideas can help inspire another Military SO.

Much love,

Amy